Posts Tagged With 'achievement'

3 Worst Words You Can Say to Your Child

3 Worst Words You Can Say to Your Child

Can you imagine what they are? No, I don’t mean cursing or calling him names. Those words that I have in mind are actually really polite, can be even nice and well-meaning, but they are deadly.

They will not kill your child, of course, but they will kill his ambition, his dreams and his motivation. And those are the things that we as a parents need to empower. What would happen to your child, when he grows up and find himself in the life with no future, no motivation, no inspiration and nothing to look after? He might just be dead as well.

And what are those 3 words?

Empower Your Kids to Take Charge of Their Lives From Early Years on

Posted by Alenka  in Law of Attraction, Parenting 1 Comment »
Empower Your Kids to Take Charge of Their Lives From Early Years on

When we have our own kids, we want them to raise into responsible, accountable human beings, but very often parents limit the children’ power to express themselves and to take charge. We tell them what to do and how to do it. Some parents might argue that we are trying to protect them from the dangers of the world, but by doing so we are taking away their control and self-esteem. Parents need to learn to give the kids responsibility for their lives.

Here are few ways how you can do it from early years on.

When the kids are really small they depend on you and your care. But as soon as they can do something by their own, let them do it. Encourage their trying and efforts. Just like we are enthusiastic about walking, speaking and riding a bike, teach them other smaller tasks like dressing up, eating, putting away toys etc. with the same enthusiasm.

I wish I would…

Posted by Alenka  in Law of Attraction, Parenting No Comments »
I wish I would...

As you grow older, you’ll find the only things you regret are the things you didn’t do.

Zachary Scott


The other day, my husband was contacted by an advertising company to get our daughter Anja to a casting for a telecommunications advertising campaign. It was quite a surprise call, as it was Saturday afternoon and she never applied. Later we discussed it was probably the same casting company that filmed the ad at the swimming pool some time ago and back then Anja’s friend performed in it.

But as I might think she would jump at the opportunity, I mean, which teenager would not want to be a TV star and earn some money, she refused to go.

Do you set up your child’s future?

Posted by Alenka  in Law of Attraction, Parenting No Comments »
Do you set up your child's future?

“As simple as it sounds, we all must try to be the best person we can: by making the best choices, by making the most of the talents we’ve been given.” Mary Lou Retton

 

Do you have any predetermined ideas about your child’s ability and competence? Like he’s no good for math? Or he will never be good at sports?

I must admit when I saw my children grow, I created a picture in my head, that Anja (older daughter) will never be good at sports. She was fleshy. And clumsy. She dropped the ball even when thrown from close range. I was sure she would not even attend any sport.  But then she started swimming and she is good at it. She excels at the school athletic competition, and she loves to run. I was also sure that she would never sacrifice anything of her comfort for the sport. But then she goes to practice every day, sometimes even in the morning at 6 a.m. And her competitions took her all weekends, but she enjoys them.

Do you believe in your child?

Posted by Alenka  in Law of Attraction, Parenting No Comments »
Do you believe in your child?

I’m sure your immediate answer would be: “Of course, I do.” But do you really? Or do you believe in him only at certain occasions, whenever it is appropriate. Do you trust that he will do something that he’s never done before? Or that he is capable of doing something you think he is too young to do? Or that he can judge the situation by himself?

Whether you have small child or a teenager, there are always some tasks that you may find unsuitable or dangerous for the child.

I had a conversation with a friend the other day about children’s help in the kitchen.

I let my children help in the kitchen and cook the meals, even if I had to throw away some ingredients or even if we sometimes ate overcooked spaghetti or too salty salad. I trusted them with the knives at quite early age. They started with the salads and progressed to cooking and baking. Now when I am not at home they are totally capable of preparing the meal for the whole family. I am not afraid that they will cut themselves or that they will burn the house. Of course we had some accidents, but, hey, that’s life.

But on the other hand, my friend said that her daughter would really love to help, but she doesn’t have the time to wait for her, because the girl is too slow. By the time the poor kid does something, my friend gets the whole meal ready.

And this whole conversation makes me think, how we sometimes sabbotage our children with our own limiting beliefs. We do the things instead of them, because they are too small, too slow, too weak… We prepare their clothes for next day, we pack their bags, we cut their meat, we serve them food, we drove them to school, we study with them…

Believe and act as if it were impossible to fail. Charles F. Kettering

But actually we are doing it because we don’t have time, patience or positive beliefs in our children. We often think, that they would not do it themselves as good as we do. Oh, and sometimes it is too dangerous. I know, sometimes really is, but often times we are just protecting ourselves from more work and worries.

What are you doing yourself that you are limiting your child? Is it really helping your child? What message are you delivering to your child? Is it that he is not capable, competent, nor trustworthy? Or do you believe in him and give him a chance to prove it? Think about it!

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